Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize