Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
