No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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