Having a random hookup so left but love u
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
