I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
FUCK WHALES
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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