I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize