Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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