I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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