Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
