I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize