He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
this hospital has no fireball
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
