ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
