Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
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