Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
