You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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