im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
