You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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