hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
