Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
