hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
