I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
