I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
