sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
