I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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