I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
