Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
