I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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