it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
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