Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize