she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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