ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
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