hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize
