the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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