i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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