She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
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