Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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