At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize