On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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