do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
