Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
