I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
