Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
