Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Randomize