I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Randomize
