I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize