somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
