It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Randomize
