She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize