i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
