Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
