your room smells of hookers.
And success
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
