Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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